There are very few words that could sum up what I’ve been experiencing but I’m still going to try. Love, Hate, Joy, Sadness, and Dance.
Truly the one thing that is the same where ever you go in the world is love. Love comes in many forms but in the end the look that you mama gives you when you are eating chicken and rice or the hug goodnight from your papa is the same feeling that you have back home.
I would say the biggest battle I’ve been fighting at the moment is Hate. Not about Peru or its people. I love the people and the more I embrace the culture the more I feel I understand how special it truly is. I’ve been hating myself. I hate myself for not knowing what my mama is asking me. I hate myself for not remembering a word I have heard 100 times. It stinks worse than a skunk and the worst part is… I’m the only one that can solve that problem. And there is only one solution. Stop hating. Which is a lot easier said than done!
Joy has finally decided to join the bandwagon of emotions and is now visiting me every day. The daily comments of “Oh that’s different.” Has turned into “Me gusta!” (which means I like in Spanish) I find joy in the little things that I over looked because they were different. Like the fact that a little spoon and a big spoon have 2 different names. At first I was puzzled as to why the same thing but smaller would be called something different but know I find such joy in the names. You never have to ask, “do you want a big one or a little one?” You just say cuchara and they know what you mean.
I still miss home. This is where sadness comes in. For a few nights I was cursed with nightmares making it hard to find sleep comforting. Home is still in everything you see. They have the same things here but everything is different, if that makes any sense. Every difference is another reminder that you’re not where your heart says you should be. But at this time I just tell the mind to tell the heart to just pump blood like it’s suppose to!
Que the dancing! We dance. And dance. Oh! And guess what! We dance some more. It has been the biggest blessing on this exchange besides google translate and my host family. I have 2 left feet and no sense of what to shake where, at what time but letting a new genre of music flow through you and dictate where your body moves is a thrilling experience. Plus you don’t need a lot of Spanish to mimic a dance instructor. Our dance instructors are very encouraging and fun without using too many words, which in my opinion should be highly commemorated!
Well. It’s late. I need to sleep to be ready for tomorrow. I think my mama will let me ride the bus on my own soon! I’m sure there will be a funny, “yep I got lost on public transportation” story to follow once she does but in the words of Bilbo Baggins, “I’m quite ready for another adventure.”
Caio chicos!